Home Is Where The Heart Is
by Vicky
Summary: Dan recalls a story from his childhood at Plumfield (told from Dan's point of view)


HOME IS WHERE THE HEART IS   
A "Little Men" Fan-Fiction Story - by Vicky 

_This is a narrative story told from Dan's point of view. He is reflecting on an event from Plumfield's past, and his childhood._

Not many of us remember what exactly happened, what exactly was said ... but I do. I remember it like it was yesterday. Who would have ever thought that life at Plumfield could be changed so much by one person, one event, one moment in time? 

"Come on, Dan, wake up," Nat said as he shook me. 

I grumbled something incoherent and rolled over in Nat's direction. "What time is it?" 

"It's time for breakfast Dan. Mrs. Jo's been wonderin' where you are. You better hurry up before ya get in trouble again." 

I sat up and rubbed my eyes, "Okay, okay. Tell her I'll be down in a minute." Nat nodded and left the room. I slowly pulled on a shirt and pants, carrying my boots downstairs with me. 

"Nice of you to finally join us Dan," Mrs. Jo greeted me at the base of the stairs. "Good to see you're wide awake." She rustled my hair and led me into the dining room to join the others for breakfast. 

Breakfast was just like any other that mornin'. I glanced around the table at everyone. Everybody was in their seat 'cept for Nick. "Where's Nick?" I asked, lookin' in Mrs. Jo's direction. 

"He went into town for something or other. He was kind of vague," she replied, not makin' eye contact with me and pokin' at her food. I saw a worried look on her face, but I didn't say anythin' else ta her. 

After the table was cleared, everyone headed to the barn for school. I waited outside the house to talk ta her before class started. "Mrs. Jo," I said when she walked down the porch steps. 

"Yes, Dan," she smiled. 

"Why did Nick go into town so early?" 

"He had some errands to do, just like I told you earlier." Again, she wouldn't look me in the eye. 

"Somethin's going on that you're not tellin' me about. It looks like ya gotta tell someone ... and I can keep a secret." I gave her a half-grin, knowin' she'd tell me - in time. 

Puttin' her hand on my shoulder, she sighed and looked toward the school. "After class. We're already late and I don't want the other children getting worried now." 

"Alright," I nodded my head and followed her to the barn. 

* * * * * * * * * * 

"When we finish our chores we're gonna go fishin'," Tommy said after school, "Ya wanna come, Dan?" 

"I hafta talk to Mrs. Jo first, but I will if I have time," I called after him. Tommy waved and went into the house to begin his dreaded chores. 

"Why don't you sit down?" Mrs. Jo sat at a desk and pointed to the one next to her. 

"So what's goin' on with Nick? I'm surprised he's not back by now." 

Mrs. Jo bit her bottom lip and wrung her hands. "That's what I was going to tell you about, Dan. Nick did go into town this morning, but he didn't go to Concord - he went to Boston." 

"Boston?" I questioned, "What's in Boston?" 

"A group of Merchant Marines," she replied, a tear fallin' onto her cheek. 

"Don't tell me Nick's thinkin' of goin' back to sea. Not after everythin' that's happened between the two of you." 

Mrs. Jo nodded her head and turned away from me. "He went to see when they're leaving port and when they'd be returning to Boston ... if they'd be returning to Boston." 

"If?" I couldn't believe what Mrs. Jo had just told me - Nick might be leavin' Plumfield ... and not comin' back. "You musta heard 'im wrong, Mrs. Jo. Nick can't leave us - he's part of the family." 

"I'm not lying, Dan. I didn't want to believe it last night when he told me, but he's serious." Tears began fallin' from her eyes and she quickly wiped them away, hopin' I wouldn't see 'em, but it was too late. "I assumed that he'd want to go back to sea someday ... but I thought he'd wait until after you children left. And now that he and I are courting ... maybe courting ..." Mrs. Jo's voice trailed off as she hid her face in her hands and sobbed. 

I stood up from my seat and moved behind her. I gently placed my hand on Mrs. Jo's back to try to comfort her. "Don't worry Mrs. Jo. I'll talk to him tonight when he gets back. Everythin's gonna be alright." 

Mrs. Jo raised her head and looked at me with sad eyes. "You don't have to do that Dan, it's not your problem to deal with." 

"Yes it is! I don't want Nick leavin' anymore 'an you do. He's the closest thing I've ever had to a pa and I don't wanna see 'im go away." 

Mrs. Jo tried to smile at me and gave me a hug. "I'm glad I'm not alone anymore. Thank you, Dan." 

As much as I hate to admit it, my eyes started to tear during that hug, but I never told Mrs. Jo 'bout it. "You'll never be alone. Not as long as I'm alive." 

"Oh, Dan," she sighed, "What would I do without you?" I just grinned at her, slightly blushing, and squeezed her hand reassuringly. "No one else knows about this, not even Asia." 

"Okay, you have my word." 

* * * * * * * * * * 

Nick didn't return from Boston 'til after dark that night. I met 'im in his room after he had taken care of the horses for the night. I was nervous and unsure of myself, but I had to stay strong for Mrs. Jo. "Where were ya today, Nick?" 

"I had ta ride into Boston ta see a friend," he answered, removing his hat. 

I decided ta cut ta the chase, "About going back to sea?" I grimaced, waiting for his response. 

"Maybe. Who told ya that?" Nick wouldn't make eye contact with me and moved around the room, trying to find things ta do. 

"Mrs. Jo. Is it true Nick?" I was tryin' not ta sound upset, but I knew I wasn't doin' a good job. 

"I'm lookin' in ta it, yeah." 

"Why do ya wanna leave? Ya know everyone's gonna miss ya ... 'specially Mrs. Jo, now that the two of you are kinda courtin'." 

"I agreed ta stay at Plumfield 'til my sentence was up for hittin' Captain Hoffman an' that was a long time ago. I'm ready ta move on." By this time Nick had all but pushed me outta his room. I could tell he was gettin' angrier an' didn't want me askin' any more questions, but I couldn't stop. 

"That's not fair to us, Nick. We ... and you ... deserve Plumfield and all it has to offer. It won't be the same if you leave. If it wasn't for you, I probably woulda left a long time ago," I almost shouted that last sentence, hopin' to drive home my point, but it apparently didn't work. 

"I shoulda too ... and now I'm gonna go - whether you like it or not, Dan." Nick glared at me and told me ta leave, without so many words. 

"Fine. I hope you're happy, Nick. You may not know it, but you're breakin' Mrs. Jo's heart!" With that, Nick slammed the door in my face. "And mine," I whispered. 

Little did I know Nick sat down on his bed after I left and broke into tears. 

* * * * * * * * * * 

When I entered the house everyone was asleep, 'cept Mrs. Jo. "It's useless," I told her, "He's got his mind set on leavin' an' I don't think anythin's gonna change it." 

"At least you tried. I guess if he's going to leave we can't stop him ... but I really wish I could." 

"So do I Mrs. Jo. Nick's part of the reason I've stayed at Plumfield so long." 

"What do you mean, Dan?" 

I sat down in front of the hearth and watched the blazin' fire, not wantin' to look at Mrs. Jo. "I've always lived on the streets of Boston, you know that. As strange as it may seem, I loved that life - not knowin' what was gonna happen next. Life was a total adventure. Here at Plumfield I'm not runnin' any more, thanks to you ... and Nick. Ya kept my attention focused on other things. I missed the adventure and excitement of the streets, but found other things ta keep me occupied. If it wasn't for Nick helpin' me find somethin' I like ta do, I probably woulda run away long ago." I started ta tear up, but rubbed my eyes before Mrs. Jo could see. 

"Does Nick know this?" Jo asked, sitting beside me on the floor. 

"I told him, but he wouldn't listen ta me." 

"He has to listen to us. Nick's touched everyone's life in a special way - we just have to find a way to get through to him and make him understand." 

I turned and looked into Mrs. Jo's eyes. They were normally happy an' full of life, but now they were sad an' dark. "Whatever we do it has ta be fast. He could leave anytime. Maybe it's time we told the others ... they could only help us now." 

"In the morning. It's time for you to go to bed. It's almost eleven o'clock." 

"If you don't mind, I'd like to stay up a little longer. I just wanta think 'bout things." 

"You sure?" Mrs. Jo asked, standing. 

I looked up at her an' nodded my head, "I won't be up much longer. I promise." 

Mrs. Jo kissed me on the cheek and walked ta her room, leaving me alone with my thoughts. I know I didn't really have control of the situation set before me, but I felt that I had to control it. The only problem was, I didn't know how. Why do things hafta change, 'specially when you think they can't get any better ... or worse? 

* * * * * * * * * * 

I didn't sleep real good that night 'cause I was thinkin' of a plan ta keep Nick at Plumfield. One good thing did come of my sleepless night though, I came up with a great idea ... hopefully one that would work. 

"Mrs. Jo!" I ran down the stairs the next mornin' eager ta tell her my plan. Everyone must have been sleepin cause the house was quiet. The dining room and parlor were empty, too. All I found was a crumpled up note on the kitchen table. I uncurled it and slowly read: 

_Jo___

_I'm sorry bout leaving, but I need to go to sea. I can't explain it cept that its somethin I have to do. I promise I'll be back, but I just don't know when. I really am sorry. Tell the kids I said goodbye and hope to see them soon.___

_I love you Jo. Don't ever forget that.___

_Nick___

This couldn't be happenin'. Nick couldn't leave 'til I had a chance ta tell Mrs. Jo my plan. He couldn't leave 'cause I still had so much to learn from him. He and Mrs. Jo had to get married and have a family together. This wasn't fair to me, to Mrs. Jo, to any of us. 

I had ta find Mrs. Jo. I couldn't see her or the kids anywhere in the house. I figured the kids would be in the hayloft 'cause we always went up there to think and talk when things weren't goin' good. I searched Mrs. Jo's normal quiet places - the school, the porch swing, the widow's walk - but I still couldn't find her. 

I finally found her sittin' up in the old willow tree at the edge of the woods. "Mrs. Jo," I quietly called to her, "Can I come sit with ya?" 

"Of course, Dan." I heard her voice crack and I saw her tear-stained cheeks. 

I climbed into the tree an' slowly sat down beside her. Without saying a word, Mrs. Jo leaned her head on my shoulder and took my hand in her own. "Where are the others?" 

"In the hayloft. Asia's with them." 

"Do you have any idea when he left?" 

Mrs. Jo shook her head and looked at me. "No. You have to go and find him, Dan. I can't . . . I mean, we can't lose him." 

I let out a deep sigh and ran my fingers through my hair. "I thought of a great idea last night, but I guess it don't matter no more. I'll go look for him just the same though." 

"Before you leave, I do have a thought. Let me know what you think of this." Mrs. Jo leaned forward and told me her idea. 

"I'm sure it'll work, but we better get started on it." 

"The children are already working on it in the hayloft. I'm sure they'll be done soon, then you can leave." Mrs. Jo and I climbed down from the tree and walked ta the barn. 

Asia and the kids met us halfway ta the house. "Here, Dan," Nat handed me a stack of papers, "Give these to Nick if ... when you find him." 

"He may want this too." Nan reached forward and placed a rock in my hands. It was the same rock that we had given Nick last year when he wanted ta go back to sea. "I found it in his room." 

"Everything'll be alright. It has ta be." A smile crossed my face, although I looked stronger on the outside than I felt on the inside. 

"Be careful," Mrs. Jo called after me I rode off toward Boston with Penny. 

* * * * * * * * * * 

When I got ta Boston it was late afternoon. I didn't know for sure, but I had a gut feelin' that Nick hadn't left for sea yet - now I just had to find him. 

I started checkin'every hotel an' tavern that I knew about in town. I was gettin' discouraged 'cause I couldn't find Nick anywhere. I mounted Penny ta ride back ta Plumfield, not wantin' to tell Mrs. Jo and the others the bad news, but somethin' caught my eye. It was a small tavern that I had never seen before. I got off Penny an' tied her up. I walked toward the tavern, crossing my fingers, hopin' that Nick would be there - he had to since this was my last chance. 

I opened the door an' scanned the crowded room. There were men drinkin', playin' cards, laughin'. I walked over ta the bartender an' gave him a description of Nick, hopin' he had seen him some time during the day. He thought a moment, then pointed across the room, "That might be the man you're lookin' for. Just showed up this mornin' and he's been sittin' there most of the day." 

"Thanks." I looked in the direction the bartender was pointin'. I couldn't believe my eyes - it was Nick! I hurried over to the table an' sat in front on him. "Why ya doin' this, Nick?" 

Nick stared up at me in disbelief. "What the heck are ya doin' here Dan!" he said in a loud whisper. 

"I'm tryin' to stop you from makin' a big mistake! Do you realize what you're doin' ta us at Plumfield? Mrs. Jo's been cryin' two days straight, the other kids are upset beyond belief. Why Nick?" 

Nick leaned back in his chair. "It's somethin' I gotta do Dan. It's time for me ta move on with my life, put Plumfield behind me." 

I stood up, anger fillin' me ta the top. "Nick, why now? What are you afraid of? We need you!" 

He leaned forward and rubbed his face with his hands. "It's complicated Dan. You won't understand." 

"Try me!" I sat back down in a huff of anger. 

"Look," he sighed, "I love Mrs. Jo. I'm scared 'bout what's gonna happen to Plumfield if people find out that we have feelin's for each other. I don't wanna put her in danger ... I love her too much." 

I was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, I reached into my bag and pulled out the stack of papers an' the rock. "These are from everyone. They wanted ya ta have some memories of your time at Plumfield. Keep 'em, throw 'em away ... it don't really matter, but at least take the time to read 'em. I hope ya realize that Mrs. Jo ain't the only one that loves ya." 

"Dan ..." Nick started to say somethin', but I stopped him. 

"Just hear me out 'fore I leave. Mrs. Jo always says not to worry 'bout what other people think of ya - ya have ta follow your heart. You've touched all our lives an' we don't want ya ta forget that." I reached out to shake his hand. "Hope we cross paths again." 

Nick took my hand an' gave it a firm shake. "Tell everyone I'm sorry ... and tell Jo I love her." 

I nodded and left Nick to his thoughts. Mounting Penny, I said a little prayer for his return home an' left Boston for Concord. 

* * * * * * * * * * 

The next day was sad an' quiet 'round Plumfield. We all attended church an' did our chores, tryin' to keep a happy appearance on the outside, but most of us failed miserably. At lunch that afternoon, everyone had questions for me 'bout the night before. 

"Was Nick happy?" asked Tommy.   
"When's he comin' home?" Rob wanted to know.   
"Did he read our letters?" Nat questioned. 

"Did he say why he left?" inquired Nan. 

Of course I didn't know the answers ta half the questions I was bein' asked, but I didn't let that stop me from givin' answers. 

"Sure he was Tommy. He loves the sea."   
"Soon Rob, don't worry."   
"I'm sure he will Nat." 

I had to think a minute 'bout Nan's question. "Nick just said it was somethin' he had ta do, Nan." 

In the middle of our conversation I heard footsteps on the front porch. Gettin' up from the table I opened the front door, but didn't see anyone. Maybe I was imaginin' things. Shuttin' the door I walked back ta the dinin' room ignorin' what I thought I'd heard. 

"What was that all about?" Mrs. Jo asked when I sat back down. 

"Nothin'. Just thought I heard somethin'. Guess I was wrong." I shrugged my shoulders an' began eatin' again. 

A few minutes passed an' the footsteps sounded near the kitchen door. "I definitely heard somethin' this time." 

"So did I," added Nat. 

Both of us moved into the kitchen. Standing before us was Nick. He was lookin' through the cupboards for food, just like always. "Nick, you came back," I whispered. 

"Oh, hey boys," Nick nonchalantly said as he turned ta look at us. "What's for lunch?" 

Nat an' I were speechless. Findin' his voice, Nat answered, "Uh ... we're havin' chicken in the dining room." 

"Sounds good ta me. Let's go." Nick led the way into the dinin' room, takin' his seat at the table. 

Mrs. Jo looked up when she heard the chair slide across the floor. "Nick," she said, in a tone filled with mock-seriousness, "You're late." 

"Sorry, I had some things I had to think about first." 

* * * * * * * * * * 

Once Nick came home no one really talked 'bout the sadness those few days brought. Everyone at Plumfield became closer too - more family-oriented. No one left again. Well, I take that back. Two or three years later us kids started leavin' for college an' to make our way in the world, but we always kept in touch with Mrs. Jo ... and each other. 

When I was 19, I returned to Plumfield for the weddin' - Nick and Mrs. Jo's. Nick finally came ta his senses and started courtin' Mrs. Jo the following week. They were engaged a few months later. The ceremony was beautiful an' everythin' went wonderfully, but that's another story for another time. Anyway, Nick an' I were sittin' down, catchin' up on old times, when he mentioned his leavin' from years earlier. It was weird since none of us had mentioned it since it happened. 

Surprisingly, Nick had kept all the letters we wrote him. He told me that he kept them close to his heart so that he wouldn't think of leavin' again. Before I left to go back ta my home out West, Nick handed me a package. "Don't read this 'til your home." 

"What is it, Nick?" I asked, lookin' at the bundle he placed in my hands. 

"Home." Nick reached out to shake my hand, but pulled me into a hug instead. 

* * * * * * * * * * 

I opened the package durin' my train ride West. I hate to admit it, but I started cryin' when I saw the contents for the first time - it contained the letters we wrote ta Nick. I started leafin' through 'em, thinkin' 'bout the love an' memories each of 'em contained. I came across one that I didn't recognize. It was from Nick. 

_Dan,___

_I can't thank ya enough for comin to get me that night so many years ago. You made me realize that home is where your heart is. No matter where I am I know that Plumfield is my home and that it's filled with people who love me. I thought that by goin to sea I could escape the feelings I had for Jo, but you were right - it don't matter what people think. If it wasn't for you putting my head on straight who knows what woulda happened - I wouldn't be marrying the love of my life, that's fer sure.___

_I really can't thank ya enough Dan. Keep these memories safe for me cause I don't need em no more since I'm not gonna leave anytime soon. Remember that memories make a man - hold them close to ya.___

_Nick_

* * * * * * * * * * 

That night I sat an' read each an' every one of those letters. They made me laugh ... and cry ... but I treasured every minute of it. Nick had touched everyone's lives an' had changed them for the better. That's somethin' that none of us are gonna forget for a long time to come.   


_All characters (c) PAXtv, Little Men and all other relavent parties. This story has been written for the enjoyment of other Little Men fans and is not meant to infringe upon the copyrights of any of the above people._


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